| Smoke and Mirrors
Campaign
By Art Buchwald I went to see Harry Pusher of the Pusher & Pusher Advertising Agency. He wasn't in a good mood. He had made a presentation to the Philip Morris Cos. for their account in Czechoslovakia and was turned down. Harry said, "We blew it. This is what happened. Philip Morris had
a study done in the Czech Republic, which concluded that smoking was not
a drain on the country's economy. It was just the opposite. If people
die prematurely the government saves money on health care, pensions and
housing." "That makes sense. I wonder why no one thought of it before,"
I said. "Arthur D. Little, the ones who did the study for Philip Morris,
weighed the cost of cigarette smoking against medical costs and said that
it was still cheaper for the government to have its citizens smoke and
die early. In 1999 the Czech government had a net gain of $147 million,
which includes how much the government collects in cigarette taxes." "Then why are you so depressed?" "When we read the report, we thought Philip Morris would want a
new advertising campaign for the Czech Republic. I got my creative team
on it right away. What do you think of this?" he said, holding up
a large sketch that read: "Light Up -- Enjoy a Cigarette. It May
Be Your Last." "I like it," I said. Then he held up another one: "My Father Smoked Three Packs a Day
and Died at the Age of 49. He Loved His Country Very Much." "Patriotism and smoking," I said. "You couldn't ask for
anything more." The third sign read: "Every Time a Smoker Dies, the Government Saves
$1,227." "This should be printed on the backs of all the cigarette packages.
Is that a picture of a doctor?" He held up another sign with the message: "The doctor says, 'I know
how expensive it is to keep sick smokers alive. That's why I always recommend
pulling the plug on them.' " "You mean with advertising ideas like this you didn't get the account?" "Philip Morris chickened out, and instead of flaunting the study
they're apologizing for it. They're afraid it will work against them,
not in the Czech Republic, but in this country." "How can they say that?" "They wouldn't even look at our artwork. They said it was a mistake
to release this study because when people read about the surplus the government
has they will demand a tax break." "That's not fair," I said. "They said no even after we tried to change the campaign. He held
up another poster: "Light Up and Welcome to the Marlboro Country
in the Sky." © 2001 Tribune Media Services Inc. |